April 17th, 2023

Read the first two chapters and it’s pretty interesting so far. I forget the character names, but the main character is this weird young man in St. Petersburg who is completely broke. He seems like a schizo and he goes to this pawn shop that he has been to before to try to get some money. He’s very suspicious and it seems like he’s planning to kill the old lady who runs the shop. The shop is just her house, I don’t even know if pawning is legal in this time and place. Unlike himself, he then goes to a tavern for a beer. This strange little drunk stares at him and ultimately approaches him. The drunk then tells him his whole story with an air of sophistication. He is, or was, a government clerk. Due to his drinking he’s lost his job and his daughter became a prostitute to feed her step mother’s children. It’s a real mess. Then he gets it together and begs for his job back. Life’s good, then he steals the money he gave to his wife and spend it all drinking for 5 days, even asking his daughter for money. He’s a sad creature and all the patrons laugh at him. The owner has heard this story before. At the end, he decides to go home and the main character helps him. It’s a sad sight as well. His wife then abuses him and the main character leaves.

April 24th, 2023

This is my second entry but I’ve read like 80 pages since the first. It’s been a wild ride! I have to admit, I can’t remember all the details. The rest of “Part One” has a lot of Raskolnikov (the main character) wandering around town. He tries to avoid everyone. He is in debt to his landlady. The cook/housekeeper Nastia seems pretty sweet and might even genuinely be worried about Raskolnikov. She brings him his breakfast (the landlady stopped serving him dinner), even though he sleeps constantly, and brings him a letter. It’s a long one from his mother, who explains why she hasn’t written. She was broke from putting a loan on her pension to give to her son (Rodion Raskolnikov). She also tells him that his sister was in a big scandal because her boss as governess was coming on to her and the wife found out. It was a long story, but after it all blew over, the wife introduced the sister to her cousin. Now they’re getting married and he might get a job for Rodion and they’ll all be in Petersburg soon. What seemed like a harmless letter left Raskolnikov fuming. He thinks is him is selling his sister for his benefit, and he analyses every word she wrote. He wanders the city and I wonder if any events that will come back later. The drunk guy’s story has not come back, though Raskolnikov has thought about his saintly prostitute daughter Sonia. He runs into a drunk teen girl and sees a man who is probably going to try to rape her (she probably already was by the guy that got her drunk) and he starts yelling at the guy. A cop approaches and takes the girl, and Raskolnikov paid for her cab before saying something weird. He also left money for the drunk earlier.

Well, the meat is that, as predicted, Raskolnikov is thinking about murdering the old pawn lady and has been holed up in his apartment for days or weeks thinking about it. One night he was in a pub and overheard two officers discussing her just after he had pawned his first object. Then one mentions how awful she is and the good one could do by killing her and taking her money for the poor, which she was going to give to a monastery after she died. Not even a penny for her simple-minded sister, who she beats. Raskolnikov takes this as a sign, since he was thinking the same thing. A bunch of signs added up, so he had to kill her. He finds out the sister will not be home at 7pm and decides its time. He has a noose in his coat to hide an ax, but he can’t take the ax from the kitchen because Nastia is there. His plan seems to fall apart until he finds one in the porter’s unlocked and open front room. A sign. So he goes and hits the old lady in the head and kills her. He stuffs his pockets and tries the lock box but can’t figure it out. Then he hears something. The sister comes home. She doesn’t even scream or fight. Raskolnikov kills her. Now he can no longer claim he is helping anyone when he murders the one who would benefit most by the old lady’s death. He is freaking out and panicking since he left the door open. He closes the door as two men approach. They try the door but it is latched. They feel something is wrong and one goes for the porter. The second, impatient, follows soon after. I think the first one may be a friend/associate of Raskolnikov. We’ll see. With them gone, Raskolnikov hides in the empty apartment downstairs until the coast is clear. Then he heads home.

Part Two. He is feverish and all messed up that night. In his panic he forgets to remove his blood stained clothes, his noose, and hide his stolen goods. He is really out of it and goes in and out of sleep. Nastia and the porter wake him up with a police summons. To keep it short, he’s not a murder suspect yet. It was his debts to the landlady. But, he hears the police talk about the murder. He faints, and one who he quarreled with starts questioning him. Raskolnikov is a nervous wreck.

April 26th, 2023

Raskolnikov is still in a panic an delirious. He ends up back home assuming people would be searching his things. Of course, he is paranoid and no one is there. He takes the stolen goods to throw them in the canal, but too many people are present. He walks to the Neva instead, but finds an abandoned place full of junk. He hides these things under a rock there, not bothering to look in the purse for money. What was the point of the killing? He wanders and ends up at Razmukhin’s, the only person he could probably call a friend. He goes to talk to him but acts very strangely and weird. Razmukhin offers to split some work with him for a few rubles, but Raskolnikov just wanders off, angering Razmukhin. He ends up back home and is in some feverish dream. He sleeps for 4 days apparently, vaguely remembering people come in. When he comes to, Nastasia and a man are there. Then Razmukhin appears, having angrily searched the city to find Raskolnikov’s address. Long story short, Razmukhin is a decent friend. He has befriended the landlady and seems to be charming Nastasia. He paid to get the IOU back, so the cops will be off Raskolnikov’s back. He brought a doctor a couple times while Raskolnikov was feverish. Now this stranger is the second man to visit from the office to attempt to deliver 35 rubles from Raskolnikov’s mother, as promised in the letter. Raskolnikov is pouty the whole time, and it is revealed he was mumbling about some strange things in his sleep (socks, trousers, the stolen goods). Razmukhin is very cheerful but it only rubs Raskolnikov the wrong way. After all this, Razmukhin takes 10 ruble from Raskolnikov, who then falls asleep. 6 hours later, he returns with new clothes for Raskolnikov. He must have something in mind.

April 28th, 2023

Zossimov, the doctor friend and a bit of a dandy, arrives and examines Raskolnikov. He seems fine, then Razmukhin and Zossimov start chatting about a house-warming party for Razmukhin, which then goes into the discussion of the murder. Razmukhin and another fellow are trying to help out a painter who was arrested and accused of the crime. To summarize, the two painters were goofing around during the murder and then ran into the street to “fight”, like children. When one returned, he found some earrings in a box. This startled Raskolnikov, as we know he was hiding in there and must have dropped the the box. Razmukhin figures out the whole murder as it happened, but it is hard to prove without a murderer. The painter takes the earrings, pawns them, and gets drunk. Once the murder is known, the pawn broker confronts him and he freaks out and runs. He is found later about to hang himself. To the police, this is proof he did it. He claims he was afraid of being accused. Razmukhin believes him innocent, which is true, and is trying to get him freed. The whole discussion worries Raskolnikov. Then a stranger appears, a big gentlemen with an air of importance. It is Luzhin (or whatever) the fiance of Raskolnikov’s sister. To this man’s dismay, nobody is impressed by him. After some awkward moment’s, he comes in and explains himself. Razmukhin is not interested in his words, and Raskolnikov eventually lashes out in anger at him. He then leaves in a huff, and shortly the other guys leave. Only Nastia remains, who Raskolnikov tells to get out. He lays in bed.

May 13th, 2023

A lot has happened since the last entry, and I’m sure I will get some of it wrong. The third section concludes with a tragedy, in a way. Raskolnikov sneaks out and wanders the streets. He can’t live with his guilt and thinks of going to the police. He walks around talking to strangers, creeping people out. He ends up at some restaurant and sits down. The chief of police or whatever from the station was there drinking. They talk, and Raskolnikov kind of confesses the murder. The cop thinks he’s crazy and messing with him. He leaves very confused. Raskolnikov leaves and runs in to Razumikhin. They have a fight and Raskolnikov continues to walk. He stops at the canal and looks in, when a woman comes up and jumps in. She ends up being rescued. He walks more and comes to the scene of an accident. A drunken man had walked in front of a carriage. Raskolnikov approaches and finds the clerk from chapter 2. He organizes the people to take him home to his family and to get a doctor. It is a sad scene. His tubucular wife is a pathetic site, along with the undernourished children. The mom sends the oldest girl for Sonia, the clerks prostitute daughter. A doctor says the man has no chance. The clerk becomes aware of his surroundings and his family, including Sonia, and says his goodbyes. Raskolnikov, depressed by the events, gives the money from his mother to the widow for the funeral. He leaves, and the little girl comes out to thank him. Raskolnikov is moved by the love of this child and decides he wants to live out his life. He goes to Razumikhin to tell him about the night. Razumikhin, drunk from his housewarming party, leaves to take Raskolnikov home. When they arrive, someone is in his room. It is his mother and sister.

Raskolnikov returns to a strange mental state and pretty much insults everyone. He tells his sister to choose between him and Peter Petrovich Luzhin, the fiance. Razumikhin takes the ladies to their lodgings and seems to fall in love with the sister, Dunia. Razumikhin and Zossimov come in the night to report on Raskolnikov. The next day, they receive a letter from Luzhin saying he will visit shortly, but Raakolnikov must not be there. Razumikhin joins them and they have breakfast and discuss the matter. They then go to Raskolnikov’s who is in a “normal” state, but it seems forced and somewhat malicious. Zossimov is there. After some strange and painful conversation, Raskolnikov says he meant what he said last night about Luzhin. Dunia tells him of the letter, and her choice is to invite him. This won’t go well.

May 16th, 2023

Read a short chapter. Suddenly, Sonia appears. She is shocked by all the people present and is very timid and embarrassed. She is also shocked that the man who gave so much money lives in such a hovel. The mother is a bit prudish, but the sister is probably more understanding. Raskolnikov does not recognize her at first but then does and introduces her. The ladies leave and Raskolnikov keeps Sonia around to talk more. Eventually they and Razumikhin leave. Sonia is followed by a stranger, I think Luzhin. It appears they are neighbor lodgers. The two Rs go to some Porfivy guy. I guess this is a friend of associate of Razumikhin.

May 22nd, 2023

Porfiry Petrovich is some sort of lawyer involved in the murder case. Raskolnikov is trying to play the part of an innocent man and enters the home while making light of Razumikhin’s affection for his sister. It’s all very calculated. To Raskolnikov’s distaste, Zametov is there. Raskolnikov wants to talk about getting the items he hocked to the victim. It seems that Porfiry is suspicious of Raskolnikov, but that may be only because we can see Raskolnikov’s anxiety. Porfiry is definitely mocking Raskolnikov to some degree. He then brings up an article Raskolnikov wrote and submitted, which was published without Raskolnikov being informed. It was about “ordinary” and “extraordinary” people. In it, Raskolnikov says that “extraordinary” people should be able to commit crime and not be held to laws of ordinary people. To start a revolution is to commit a crime, but the next generation exalts the criminal that bring this new order. Of course, Porfiry leads this conversation to the murder. It is an uncomfortable conversation, but Raskolnikov holds is own. Razumikhin is not pleased with the conversation or Raskolnikov’s article, and they leave, Razumikhin debating Raskolnikov on the way.

May 24th, 2023

The two Rs discuss the grilling at the cops. Razumikhin seems to accept that the cops were messing with Raskolnikov and trying to trap him. They arrive at the place Raskolnikov’s family is staying, but Raskolnikov starts panicking and leaves. He says he’ll be back and goes home. It turns out a stranger is there asking for him. He leaves and Raskolnikov follows him. The stranger then calls him a murderer. This sets Raskolnikov off in another spiral. He has some weird rambling thoughts about the murders and then passes out. He has a weird dream and wakes up to find a man in his room. End part 3.

May 25th, 2023

The man in the room, whose name I don’t remember, is the former employer of Avdotia. He tried to seduce her and all those things that was told in the letter from Raskolnikov’s mom. I think he is also the guy who is boarding next to Sonia. He’s a weird dude and they have a long conversation to the chagrin of Rodion. Now that his wife is dead, he plans on going on a long trip, but first he wants to talk to Avdotia. Essentially, he wants to give her 10k rubles so that she doesn’t have to marry Luzhin, who we must remember is his dead wife’s cousin or something. Rodion wants nothing to do with this guy, but considers talking to his sister so that this jerk doesn’t try to seek her out himself.

May 28th, 2023

After the Sdrigailov guy leaves, Razumikhin is waiting outside the house. They go to Raskolnikov’s mother and sister, and Raskolnikov tells him about the encounter. They arrive at the same time as Luzhin and it is awkward. A very uncomfortable meeting happens inside. It comes down to Avdotia telling her husband and fiance to recount their first meeting and she will judge who is in the right and who she will side with. This disturbs Luzhin immensely and, being a haughty person, expresses how insulted he is. An argument ensues and, to his surprise, Luzhin is told to leave. It seems the engagement is over, though Luzhin may swallow his pride and try to sort things out. What should end up a nice moment among family is then turned sad. Raskolnikov announces he is leaving and may never see them again. It sounds like he might turn himself in, or thinks he will be arrested. He leaves, his family distressed, and Razumikhin follows him. Raskolnikov tells him to take his place, more or less, and it is possible that Razumikhin understands that Raskolnikov is the killer. Rodion then goes to Sonia, or at like 11pm, and has another psychotic conversation. He is a dick and frightens Sonia quite a bit. It might be that he is actually worried about her future, or he is more curious about what makes her tick, from an inhuman, scientific perspective. It turns out she is very religious and deludes herself into thinking bad things won’t happen to her step-mother or her children. He says he will tell her, if he sees her again, who killed Lizabeta or whatever her name is. She was friends with Sonia. Sdrigailov hears all this from across the hall. The next day, he goes to Porfiry Petrovich for his items. They talk for a long time and it seems that Porfiry is playing all his cards, explaining with saying explicitly how to catch smart guys like Raskolnikov. It seems that Raskolnikov’s suspicions are valid, though Porfiry is still messing with him to say he is not a suspect. Raskolnikov goes to leave, but Porfiry wants to play his trump card, behind a locked door. Suddenly, noise from the hall. The painter who was arrested comes in and confesses the crime. This ruins Porfiry’s plan. Raskolnikov is temporarily free, and on his way out he meets the man behind the locked door, the guy from yesterday who called him a murderer. It was one of the random people from when Raskolnikov returned to the apartment and acted crazy. For a for days maybe, Raskolnikov is free. Though now, he is supposed to go to the funeral. End part 4.

May 29th, 2023

Enjoyed Memorial Day by reading all of part 5. It spends a lot of time on Luzhin in the beginning. He is boarding with an associate, who seems to be a communist, at the same house as Katerina Ivanovna (the widow). He has some devious plan and has his roommate, a friend of Sonia, call her in as they arrive from the funeral. He pretends to be sympathetic and gives her 10 ruble for her step-mother. The wake dinner is a mess, but that’s probably to be expected. Most of the guests didn’t show and some unknowns showed, but the seat of honor went to Raskolnikov. After a long dinner, in which Katerina was verbally abusive to the German homeowner, Luzhin enters and accuses Sonia of stealing 100 rubles. Nobody believes him, but in the end, there it was in her pocket. The roommate, watching from afar, is livid. He goes on a tirade against Luzhin and tells everyone he saw him put that note in her pocket. He thought it was modest charity, but now he knows the truth. He just can’t figure out why. Raskolnikov, silent until now, then tells of the ordeal with his sister and Sonia’s association with that story. Everyone turns on Luzhin, who leaves. Sonia is flustered and runs home. Another fight breaks out and Katerina is evicted. After these events, Raskolnikov goes to Sonia’s. He starts off weird but then essentially confesses the murders. Sonia seems to pity him more than hate him and refuses to abandon him. Raskolnikov then sort of regrets telling her, since he has now burdened her and made her life miserable. The roommate then comes in and says Katerina has lost her mind. She is making the children sing and dance for money in the street. After a big stir in the street, Katerina starts to die from tuberculosis. Before this, Avdotia finds Raskolnikov and tells him that she knows about the cops investigating him and says to come to her for help if needed. They part, maybe forever. Katerina then dies in Sonia’s apartment. To his surprise, Raskolnikov finds Sdrigailov there. He tells him he will spend the money for Avdotia helping Sonia and the children. Then he tells him that his is a neighbor and heard everything. Uh oh!

May 30th, 2023

Per character, Raskolnikov gets into a deep funk the next couple days after he’s been caught flapping his lips. He moves around town without thinking, like so many times before. He’s been to Sonia’s and seen Sdrigailov, who of course talks cryptically. Sonia still acts loving towards him, which strikes Raskolnikov as very bizarre. It is. Razumikhin visits one day to yell at him for being insensitive and mentions that Avdotia has received some letter. Might be important later. Raskolnikov’s mother is feverish and tried to visit him yesterday. Raskolnikov more or less tells Razumikhin he should marry his sister if she falls in love with him, which she probably will. This changes Razumikhin’s tune, and he comes to the conclusion that Raskolnikov is so weird because he is involved in some political plot, possibly with his sister. He leaves, then Raskolnikov goes to leave, bur Porfiry is outside. They have a very long conversation. It starts out apologetic and seems like Porfiry is apologizing for accusing Raskolnikov. But then he knows that the painter did not do the murder and finally spits it out. He knows Raskolnikov did it. He does not have evidence, but will arrest him in a couple days. He wants a confession, and cryptically quotes something Sdrigailov said earlier. Raskolnikov refuses to admit guilt and then heads off to see Sdrigailov.

June 3rd, 2023

Read some yesterday and couldn’t put it down today. Read the rest of the book. It really does keep you guessing and anxious as to what Raskolnikov and Svidrigailov will do. As Raskolnikov wanders town, he goes to Haymarket and stops Svidrigailov at a window in a bar. They both see each other and hope that they are unnoticed. Svidrigailov gives it up and tells him to come up. They talk for a long time but never bring up the murder. Raskolinov accuses of Svidrigailov of still trying to go for his sister and accuses him of sending her a letter. Svidrigailov says, and it’s true, that he is engaged to a 16 year old girl. Svidrigailov leaves and Raskolnikov follows him for awhile. Svidrigailov lies about where is going and eventually Raskolnikov gets tired of him. Once free, Svidrigailov goes to his real meeting place at the bridge. He is meeting Dunia. She refuses to be afraid of him, and they go to his apartment to possibly meet Sofia. Svidrigailov already told Raskolnikov she was out taking the orphan siblings to their new home, so we know he is lying. He eventually tells her about the murder. It’s a rough moment. He then gets aggressive and tries to grab her. She pulls out a pistol, probably from Razumikhin. He moves, she shoots. It grazes him. He tries again, but the gun fails. She gives up, and something in Svidrigailov changes. Seeing her in that state, he has a change of heart, or maybe is just snapped out of his weird obsession. He gives her the key and lets her out. He takes the gun and goes out. He makes some stops in the pouring rain, mainly to see his betrothed. He gives her a bunch of money and says he has to go to America for a while. He goes to some odd hotel he never saw before for the night and has some vivid and terrible dreams. Around daybreak he leaves and goes to the park. At the statue of Achilles he shoots himself.

That was unexpected. He was so afraid of death and dying but here he has killed himself. That day, Raskolnikov goes to say goodbye to his mother. Dunia is not there. He has a tearful goodbye and his heart softens for the first time in the book. Maybe at the death of Semionov the drunk he was emotional, but he really breaks down here. She probably understands the situation, but pretends its for his own good. She hopes to see him the next day. Raskolnikov goes home and Dunia is there. She is relieved he has not killed him, as she and Sofia feared. They talk about the crime. Raskolnikov is angered by the word crime and thinks he did nothing morally wrong. They say goodbye as well. Then he goes to Sofia and requests her cross. He tells her to stay here while he goes to the police. It looks like he has really decided to turn himself in. He walks away, leaving Sofia. On the way he stops at the crossroads and kisses the dirt road. People think him mad. He notices Sofia following him. At the police station, he plans to confess to the officer who yelled at him earlier. Nobody is there, but at that time the same officer shows up. They chat, Raskolnikov falters and requests Zametov. He’s on the outs, and in the chatter, the officer mentions the suicide of Sdrigailov. Raskolnikov goes pale and leaves. He sees Sofia, heartbroken. Is Raskolnikov going to aim for life and freedom? No. He goes back in and confesses.

The epilogue shows Raskolnikov in Siberia, sentenced to 8 years imprisonment. Sofia follows him. Dunia and Razumikhin marry and keep tabs on him through Sofia. His mother gets feverish and delusional, dying within the first year. Raskolnikov is hated by most and is resentful at his situation. Not the physical situation, but the fact that his actions failed and that he is accused of a crime that he does not consider a crime. One day at hard labor, he looks out in the wide Siberian landscape. Something comes over him. He imagines all the people and a future life for himself. Sofia finds him and he embraces her. She knows now that he actually loves her. There is a change in Raskolnikov. He chooses life. He will wait for his freedom and repent for his past. He is a new man.